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Everybody Votes: "By this time next year, I will be…" with video game personalities

Sunday, March 11th, 2007 at 7:09pm by Staff

The voting channel is perhaps the least liked of all the current Wii Channel fare because, well, it’s kind of campy and doesn’t do much of anything. The current “question” up for vote at the Everybody Votes Channel is “By this time next year, I will be…” with “Better off” and “The same/worse off” as the choices. That said, I thought it’d be fun to go outside the channel’s scope and imagine how some of today’s video game industry figureheads would vote, and why (using my time machine, natch).

Chris Hecker, Maxis developer – There was no “obscure and unemployed” choice, so I chose “the same/worse off.” After Will Wright tackled me in the moments following my GDC session and noogied me into one of the most forced and obvious video game industry apologies of all time, I was relegated to the Spore DS development team.

Phil Harrison, Sony – “better off” — Obviously. In September 2007, developers finally unlock the secrets of the Cell processor and create a tear in the space-time continuum. Game prices are readjusted for the best value prop possible and with the customer in mind. We think the new $120 price point will really resonate with consumers. And you haven’t seen gaming until you’ve played our latest Playstation Home creation, “In-game advertisement.” Oh, and using the Cell, I go back in time and scrub from history all of Sony’s PR flubs. Then I become president of the Internet.

Reggie Fils-Aime – “better off” – Um, Phil, not so fast. Remember GDC? I owned you so bad at Shiggy’s keynote that I listed you as a deduction on my taxes. In late 2007, an army of the elderly and female gamers take over the industry. Solitaire: Gears of War Edition and Cooking Mama 12 will be signature Wii titles.

Phil Harrison - “same/worse off” – Correction, in 2008 Ken Kutaragi and I are fast becoming BFFL golf buddies.

Shigeru Miyamoto, Nintendo – “worse off” – The wife-o-meter I mentioned in my GDC keynote bottoms out in late 2007 when Nintenplatypus fails to gain traction with non-traditional gamers. I rebound slightly however when the ensuing trial leads to development on Phoenix Wright: Divorce Court.

And now, your turn.

6 Comments

  1. Anonymous says...

    Jack from infendo: better off/the same, due to the fact that the ps3 gets bot home and LBG and the 360 continues to have a decent lineup Jack get’s to flex his fanboy muscles in finding something bad in evreything that isn’t Nintendo. Btw. home is free, stop complaining!(although ads do suck) hmm difficult choice, nothing or a cool space with ads, lets bring on the ads!

  2. David says...

    Brian Crecente from Kotaku:

    “Better Off” because nothing that happens to me is bad, even being a rage-o-holic who breaks my own hand by smashing it into a wall.

  3. Fesworks says...

    Jack, you are full of it! I love the Everybody Votes Channel! I like it way better than the Forcast Channel, I can tell you that.

  4. Frisby says...

    “…it’s kind of campy and doesn’t do much of anything.”

    Just like most Wii games.

    ba duMp, pow.

  5. InvisibleMan says...

    I live in the U.S., so I have to check on the “same/worse off” column for next year…

  6. Protector one says...

    Kaz Hirai - Same/worse. Kaz takes the whole Ridge Racer obsession a bit too far and powerslides his Honda Zest into a vulcano. Lava > Honda. Kaz takes massive damage.

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